This is the song that dominated my today: HAIM – Falling

I have been reading the love poems of Roman poet, Ovid for one of my papers. I have been laughing at how good they are, how eloquent his use of language is and then at times how just plain cynical about love Ovid can at once be. Relatable stuff. But I’m also feeling like my gut is churning with concentrated heat I don’t know how to relinquish. A supercharged kinetic haze of colourful warmth, misplaced within me. The type of heat that only reminds me of the only person who has ever made me feel this exact same way before. Ovid, you revenant love stirrer you. I am flustered over the past.

I wonder about some moments that got me to where I am now, right here and now, and where I may be heading. It hurts to know/think that there was a possibility those moments might have been different and may have brought about happier memories. Had I only been more…confident, I guess. I think I would still be where I am now but I don’t think I would be feeling this, temperature I am under. Warmth that I hold on to. Heat that I feel, whenever I think of her. Oh Infinite Intelligence! Oh Ovid! Oh HAIM! can I not fall in love with an illusion and get burned years later by it? Stupid biochemistry, what never was shouldn’t feel like this, shouldn’t it? If it was never real…

~ by Fionnlagh on October 8, 2013.

4 Responses to “REAL”

  1. You remind me of a proverb I liked when I was younger; “It’s easier to walk around the mountain than it is to go over, but you will miss the view from the top.” I can’t seem to find where that came from or who said it though. Interesting thoughts, Lightenup. You’ve got me thinking now.

  2. I think of “real”ity this way. It’s like living at the bottom of a huge mountain all your life and all you see and experience are the trees around you. Then you decide to climb the mountain and the higher you go, the more you realize that your original viewpoint of your world was way limited. Human experience can be likened to living at the bottom of the mountain. It’s all very real, but if you start to open your perspective, you begin to see other factors impacting you that you didn’t before. I have a world view that comes from a very big perspective of what it means to be human.

  3. Thank you, Lightenup. If you don’t mind my asking, what is your opinion about “reality” and what is real? Can all of what is real ever truly be perceivable through human senses? Sorry for the questions, I’m just interested to know about what you believe and if there’s divine reason for human behaviour. Or not.

  4. Wow, super deep honesty here and Oh yes, I have no doubt it was very real. Limited ideas of what is “reality” are at work here. Maybe this will help.

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